IslamCrunch Lifestream

I Can’t Explain You (Oh Messenger of God) by Aaron Haroon Sellars 4/24/08 I could not write about you For fear Fear of your presence And fear of My hearts’ brittleness That I might die In this pursuit Yet wishing to die In this state of intoxicated love This is the conflict within me Language cannot explain Except the language Of tears and laughter Even the molecules Of my body Shake and tremble With awe and excitement! I just can’t explain! Oh Messenger of God! I can’t explain you! Sometimes I forget To say “Prophet” before your name Not from heedlessness But from desirous haste To just say your name! Muhammad, Muhammad, Muhammad! I just can’t explain! Oh Messenger of God! I can’t explain you! Oh the mystery of how You have captured my heart As a Christian I loved the Prophets Before you But with you I get them all! I can love Abraham, Moses and Jesus Just by loving you! Without this love Your nation falls With it They are purified and irresistible! Let those who Possess this love Not be stingy Take it to the marketplace! The workplace And especially the home It’s hard to explain! Oh Messenger of God! I can’t explain you! Seeing the land of your life Causes some to live And seeing your grave Causes some to die Nothing is more difficult Than you In my youth I have written easily My love for many But when I encountered you The translator of my heart Fell mute Lost in inexplicable wonder! That is hard to explain! Oh Messenger of God! I can’t explain you! You sacrificed for me Before I was even born How should I thank you As I now walk upon the earth? My heart holds your love My tongue sends you blessings But it is my limbs That often fall short All this controversy about you A proof of the veil On the hearts of your enemies And a proof against those Who only follow you with words But don’t turn your face from me As I reach for a drink From your soft hands Because it’s hard to explain! Oh Messenger of God! I can’t explain you! I heard one of my teachers say that upon the poet is to write about the Messenger of God, may His peace and blessings be upon him. As a person who often writes things in a form that some call poetry, I have been haunted by the weight of this statement since hearing it! I converted to the way of life called “Islam” because of an overwhelming sense of the divine origin and authority of the Quran and after a mere glimpse at the life of the Prophet Muhammad, may His peace and blessings be upon him. So the feeling of love and debt is immense - yet every time I have tried to write something about him… I get stuck! I just sit there frozen with my pen hovering over a piece of paper that ultimately is left blank! Then, one of my closest companions sent me a link to a YouTube video about the “Mahabbah Awards” which is a unique awards program done in the spirit of love for God and His Messenger. Unexpectedly, this short and simple video clip opened a flash-flood of emotions and tears within me that I could not control or contain! I jumped up from my chair to try and regain my composure but felt a rumble inside like someone was boiling water in my chest! My knees started to buckle so I sat back down and felt a pressure in my head and heat in my heart that I knew from experience would lead to words! “Finally!” I said to myself, I have a chance to say something about this amazing Messenger! I quickly grabbed my pen and an orange Post-it notes pad and started to scribble as fast as I could, the English translation of this stream of consciousness and love. May the Giver of Gifts gift us with loving His beloved more than our own selves. From the book, Ash-Shifa’ of Qadi ‘Iyad… Anas said that a man came to the Prophet and asked, “When will the Last Hour come, Messenger of God?” He said, “What have you prepared for it?” He said, “I have not prepared a lot of prayer or fasting or charity for it, but I love God and His Messenger.” The Prophet said, “You will be with the one you love.” (al-Bukhari) It is related that a woman said to A’isha (may Allah be pleased with her), “Show me the grave of the Messenger of God.” She showed it to her and the woman wept until she died. Originally posted here on Sidi Haroon’s blog. Recited in commemoration of the Prophet’s birth here: http://islamcrunch.com/archives/bay-area-mawlid-2009/